Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
a search helicopter?!
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Randomize
