So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
