No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize