There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
