I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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