I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Randomize