I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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