Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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