Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize