walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
