I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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