And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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