Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
