Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize