At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
