she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize