It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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