the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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