he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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