I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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