Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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