You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
