so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
there is glitter all over my balls
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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