i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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