My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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