No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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