Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
