small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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