one two three fourrrrnication!
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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