I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
she pinky promised me she was 18
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
