maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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