I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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