dude i'm inner monologue high
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
