That's intense
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
