its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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