Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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