So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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