Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
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