I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize