you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Of course I have a pirate flag
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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