yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
