grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize