just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
from now on my penis is your penis
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
