I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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