You're my little dorito
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
40s are totally the cure
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
My apartment stinks of burning failure
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
