Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
