u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
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