Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
im six kinds of drunk right now
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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