did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
