Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?