I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
this will be a night to untag.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Randomize
